Finals are over! The last paper has been written, the tests are finished, the awkward meetings with profs ended. I should be wildly rejoicing. I just feel empty. I feel like I have missed something this past semester and just didn't quite find it. Or maybe that I did start to go somewhere good, but haven't gotten far enough yet. I'm not saying I want to stay on campus, because I don't, but shouldn't I be leaving with a feeling of relief? Victory? Triumph? I feel drained.
I called my mom after my last final and cried a little and she suggested that everything that's happened this semester is finally catching up with me. It's true this year has been rough. Not being able to find a roommate, classes where I learned little and stressed a lot, relationship conflicts, being diagnosed with dyslexia. That's a lot to process. I'm hoping that break helps me work this out, or at least prepare me to work them out during next semester.
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